Rick DiBiasio

Imagine this: you prepare a recipe from Emeril’s cook book only to have him appear and tell you, “it’s dreadful and you should never cook again.” Or you play guitar on the beach for your friends, only to find out that someone brought Simon and he makes “a face” about the way you play and then everyone laughs at you…Happens all the time, right?

As adults, we are supposed to be right. No one wants to go to a surgeon who “isn’t afraid to make a big mistake.” We are not encouraged to give creative answers to multiple choice tests, no one wants a financial advisor who picks investments only by “feel.” No, our system is built on having the “right” answers.

It’s easy to reach a point where we stop doing anything that we might not get right. What’s the opposite of stretch? Cramp? That’s what we do, we stay uncomfortable, we stick with what we know. So when it comes time to express ourselves creatively, it’s easy to filter ourselves into complete submission. Much easier to watch a reality show than live a little reality.

Does Emeril show up if we botch one of his recipes? Not usually, but someone even harsher does – we do. And we are relentless in our self criticism. “I hate the sound of my voice, I can’t draw, I am a terrible writer.” It’s difficult to pick up new things as an adult unless we have decided we are “talented” or “gifted,” unless we are pretty sure we can do something perfectly right from the start. Mistakes, after all, are not allowed.

And I’m not giving others a pass either; people will give you a hard time. People will “kid us,” they’ll damn with faint praise, they’ll come out and tell us how terrible our work is. Putting yourself out there is risky business if you have a thin skin.

Not long ago I heard a PGA Tour Golfer talk about “amateur” golfers, mocking people who love the same game he gets paid to play. I’ve heard John Mayer, unintelligible-pop-singer-and-musician, mock “amateur” guitar players; I guess he has some security issues. People can be mean; they have their own issues.

Can you play an instrument like a maestro? Paint like Rembrandt? Sing like Sinatra? No, you can’t! No one can – that’s why they are celebrated!

Does that mean you shouldn’t try? Not try to be as good as them – just try. Play a few notes, write a few lines, paint with some of your kid’s watercolors. No one will die. Especially you.

Allow yourself to “suck.” If someone says you aren’t very good, especially you, let it go. You aren’t supposed to be good, at least at first. In fact, you don’t ever have to be a maestro, but you can make art. You can create, you can be open to new things while acknowledging that people are entitled to their opinions. Even Maestros get criticism.

Have you nurtured someone’s gift or have you been a critic? Not just to your kids, to your friends, to your co-workers – but to yourself? Here’s the thing: when you begin a creative pursuit, you will reach a point where you wonder if you will always be doing so in a vacuum. But you develop this fear: “What if they don’t like it? What if they mock it? What if they make that Simon face?”

It’s perfectly ok if you just write in a private journal, if you just play quietly for yourself, or if you just sing your grandkids to sleep. Good things will happen if you do; you will open up new connections in your brain. And, it’s ok to let others see your work. You might be surprised at how easily people are impressed, how supportive they can actually be. You won’t know unless you stretch, will you?

Rick DiBiasio is the author of The Affluent Artist. His new project is MiddleAgedCrazy.com

Think of the progress period visually: as particles of energy spinning in a circular, but level, pattern. The particles jump to a new, higher level only when they have attained sufficient energy.

Progress in music is best described as an upward spiral. The initial stages are easy to trace. The beginner knows very little and can do very little, so every new technique and every bit of knowledge feels like a giant stride forward.

When these quick and easy strides end, problems typically set in. New information and new techniques are not so easily assimilated after the initial strides. The first doubts begin to show themselves. Students ask themselves: Why isn’t it as easy as before? Is the problem in the music? With the instrument? With me?

At this point, plateaus of accomplishment need to be understood. The ascent becomes steeper as one advances further, thus requiring more effort for each successive level. The first serious frustration occurs when, despite practice, everything seems at a standstill. It is helpful to realize exactly what is taking place in order to deal with it.

Elation is present when one jumps to a new plateau, a new level. But reaching a new level is the exception – not the rule. More time is spent striving toward that new level than actually attaining it. Thus, one must learn to live with the striving, the struggle.

It is helpful to think of this period as particles of energy spinning in a circular, but level, pattern. The particles jump to a new higher level only when they have attained sufficient energy. The period of apparent non-progress in practice is then not experienced as a negative, as frequently occurs. It is experienced as a positive accumulation of energies leading to an upward spiral of progress.

Understanding that progress – by its very nature – is a long and often arduous process helps to channel negative feelings in a positive direction, and is one of the most direct and effective antidotes for frustration.

Visit Chuck Anderson’s website to join his mailing list and learn about upcoming concerts. Buy his CDs and educational materials. And of course, become a Facebook fan!

Note from LRG: Derek Sivers, who founded CD Baby, asked 15 musicians to comment on the book “Ignore Everybody and 39 Other Keys to Creativity” by Hugh MacLeod. Chuck was among them. Here is a condensed version of his response, which he posted to his site last month.

The book links together creativity and worldly success and makes them seem possibly attainable and not entirely contradictory. The following thoughts were helpful to me as a musician expanding my career and accepting some realities of life and commerce. Each point is followed by my own personal thoughts.

The more original your idea is, the less good advice other people will be able to give you. Follow a strong gut feeling.

I have always sought advice from people on ideas and have always been surprised at what little solid suggestions I’ve received. Not that people haven’t been encouraging, but it’s become increasingly clear that they don’t really understand where I’m going. I don’t know why I expect them too. After all, I’m the one who has lived with these concepts and directions my whole life. I initially resist change and have had to rely on gut instinct to overcome my natural inertia.

The sovereignty you have over your work will inspire far more people than the actual content ever will.

I found this to be the most important concept in the book. I confess that I had never thought of it in this light. I know that my dedication to what I do has, in reality, been as important of a factor in my success as the content itself. I can more or less prove that to myself by observing my success in a wide variety of music-related activities. As soon as I aimed enthusiasm and passion at a musical activity, it succeeded.

The importance of time, effort and stamina in achieving a worthwhile goal.

This has never been an issue for me. I’ve always been a hard worker and have always understood the relationship between time, effort, stamina and achievement.

Nobody suddenly discovers anything – the myth of the overnight success.

I found that it has taken a long time to focus and concentrate on one specific, fulfilling aspect of my work. This focus is leading me in a better and more productive direction. My own career has been filled with multiple activities – all in the same music business but sufficiently scattered to prevent long term growth.

The more compelling the path, the more lonely it is.

If you do what everybody does, the path is crowded. If you totally focus on your specific goals, the path is at least less cluttered. This, however, leads to loneliness. If you can accept the feeling, you can deal with it successfully.

Keep using your box of crayons. You never outgrow the need for creative expression. Don’t let your “adult” voice squash your “wee” voice.

I don’t remember being a child but I’m sure that I was. I know that I am conservative by nature but a risk taker on another level. Accepting my own creativity has become more comfortable as I have matured in both age and artistry.

Make at least one serious attempt to get above the snow line.

I am currently making that serious attempt though I have been a music professional my entire life.

Talent doesn’t require props or pillars.

I’ve always felt that my work in music didn’t need much praise but that never prevented it from being enormously fulfilling. Your plan for getting your work out there has to be as original as the actual work, perhaps more so. This would be a tribute to planning, niche marketing and follow through in areas that are not necessarily your strength or even your interest.

Being born into a generation of non-computer users, it’s always been a puzzle as to how I could get my work “out there.” The “new music industry” seems to be offering a model by which I can get my work out to Japan to Europe to India and beyond. Though I entered this phase of my career kicking and screaming, I am now embracing it fully.

Learn to draw the “red line” that separates what you are willing to do from what you are not willing to do.

The biggest challenge for me was the decision as to what not to do. I could always do a great variety of musical work but only now am I drawing the all important “red line.”

Adapt to the changing world and don’t fight it in an effort to protect the world you knew and felt safe in.

This spells “Internet” and all of its ramifications.

Sing in your own voice.

I have never tried to emulate any other players and I think that it’s served me well.

Diluting your product to make it more “commercial” will just make people like it less.

When I finally decided to embrace what I did as “art,” the commercial dilemma faded away.

Nobody cares. Do it yourself.

I’m saddened by the fact that “nobody cares” but somehow this encourages me to not wait and hope, which I spent too much of my life doing.

Worrying about “commercial” versus “artistic” is a waste of time.

This is one of many wastes of time but an important one to remember. As Bill Evans, my favorite jazz pianist said, “In the long run, we must accept what we do as art. We must play what pleases us. Don’t chase players, don’t chase styles and don’t chase audiences. Play what you love to play and then go find the people who love what you love.”

Write from the heart.

This is perhaps a key to life as well as a key to unleashing personal creativity.

Don’t need approval, don’t be desperate. You already have the power. You don’t need to get it from anyone.

Dealing with the decision-makers in music is enough to shake anyone’s confidence. I try to find that place that presents simply and clearly who I am and what I do. I leave the rest of up to hard work and endurance.

Value the power of the internet and its role in the future.

As Michael Sembello (writer of Maniac from the film “Flashdance”) said to me, “Rome has finally fallen and we once again have control thanks to the internet.”

Legendary pianist Bill Evans said you should play the music that pleases yourself. Painting: "Submerged (Bill Evans)" by Iris Lavy.

The guitar world has always been obsessed with who is faster or better. The reality is that all good players are fast and knowledgeable about chords, improvisation, and harmony. So speed and knowledge, are, in themselves, not that meaningful.

What makes one player different from another is not the external factors of technique but the unique projection of personality that comes through the music. Just as you meet one person that you like and another person that you don’t like so much, the audience is only affected by their own individual response to a player.

Does the player move them or not? After all, the audience is not in a position to judge a player on the basis of his or her technique or knowledge. The audience can only react. This is ultimately a good thing.

Bill Evans said something that I always admired. He said you must please yourself. Play what pleases you. You can’t chase players or styles or trends. In essence, he was saying: find your own voice.

From a marketing point of view, you have to find an audience that likes your style, your sound, your personality. If you become your own unique self, you’ll never be disappointed with the results!

Note from LRG: Read more about developing your unique voice:

• Waiting Til You Have Something To Say
• Audience Connection is Barometer of Success

Herb and Dorothy Vogel collected Minimalist art well before it was in vogue. They gave their collection, worth millions, to the National Gallery of Art.

I saw a wonderful little documentary last week called “Herb and Dorothy” at a local theater. The film was about the lives of a long-married couple who built one of the most important contemporary art collections in history. And they did it on a librarian’s salary. Starting in the 1960s, Herbert Vogel, a postal clerk, and Dorothy Vogel, a librarian, began collecting Minimalist and Conceptual art from the young artists who pioneered these schools; very few people were paying attention to these schools of art at that time. Both the artists and the collectors had very few means.

But Herb and Dorthy saw great beauty in the stark creations of the artists. They spent all of Herb’s salary to purchase art they liked, and lived on Dorothy’s paycheck. Their collecting was guided by the following: the piece had to be affordable, it had to be small enough to fit in their one-bedroom Manhattan apartment, and they simply had to like it.  Amazingly, most of the artists they supported and befriended went on to become world-renowned; they included Sol LeWitt, Christo and Jeanne-Claude, Richard Tuttle, Chuck Close, Robert Mangold, and many others.

In 1992, the Vogels gifted their entire collection – 2,000 pieces - to the National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC. Although the collection today is worth millions of dollars, the Vogels never sold a single piece. Herb and Dorothy still live in the same rent-stabilized apartment in New York with aquariums of turtles and fish, and one cat. 

Megumi Sasaki, the film’s creator and director, was at the  showing and took audience questions. Several in the audience spoke up to analyze the Vogels’ sense of esthetics. A few people felt strongly that the Vogels bought certain angular pieces because the pieces looked like the mail-sorting equipment at Herb’s job (which was presented in one scene).

Sasaki said she learned very early that Herb and Dorothy simply collected what they liked. In the four years she followed them for the film, and in the years of articles written about their collecting, they never analyzed the pieces they bought. They either liked something, or they didn’t.

The purity of their love of art made me think of how true fans of music do not need to break down and analyze what they like, but simply let it into their lives. Take a look at Chuck’s post today about the James Taylor DVD that moved him so much. He showed me snippets of it at a recent lesson. He wanted me to listen to the interplay of the piano and guitar. I asked Chuck to write in his post what struck him about this music, and he had no words other than, basically, to say: the performance was moving, and he liked it.

Richard Tuttle, one of the artists interviewed in “Herb and Dorothy,” spoke of the Vogels’ laser-like focus on what they liked; he said something to the effect of this: ‘They were the only collectors I ever met whose eyes were connected directly to their souls.’ What a wonderful way to view art, music, and the world at large.

James Taylor's "One Man Band" performance at the Colonial Theater in Pittsfield, Mass., was a great example of the way "small" can result in a "big" musical experience. Photo: PBS.org

This past Christmas I received a gift of a James Taylor DVD called “One Man Band.” This recent recording was filmed at the Colonial Theater in Pittsfield, Massachusetts in July 2007. In this performance, JT goes back to his roots – a guitar, a voice, and an audience. Watch a portion of the DVD here (this contains nice clips of JT talking) and watch his full performance of “Something in the Way She Moves.”

I’ve heard many James Taylor performances but this is, by far, my favorite. I think he is at his best when he works, in his words, “small.” Piano, guitar, and voice sustained the entire show. The sound was magnificent, the dialogue clever, and the theater was intimate and beautiful.

He seems to be happy and content at this point in his life. A good marriage and a solid career with creative freedom no doubt contribute significantly to the mood that he projects.

If you want to hear a singer-songwriter with great songs, a unique guitar style, and a compelling voice, One Man Band[CD + DVD]is something you may want to own.

Visit Chuck Anderson’s website to join his mailing list and learn about upcoming concerts. Browse his CDs and educational materials. And of course, become a Facebook fan!

Audiences respond to what you say, not how objectively 'good' you are.

Anyone who plays music at an amateur level has likely had the experience of being asked: ”Are you good?” I’ve been asked it a couple of times, and I wasn’t sure how to respond. “Good” in music is so subjective, there really is no way to answer the question.

Some extraordinarily famous artists have made entire careers playing and singing songs that involve the same three guitar chords. Are those musicians “good?” It depends on how you respond to them. If you think they’re good, and their songs inspire you, then they’re good. Others may not think that a musician who plays only three chords is “good,” so they’ll listen to someone “better.”

There are amateur musicians on the Music After 50 forum who are likely “better” players than some rich and famous household names. Of course they might like to be rich and famous, but many amateur musicians are in it for the learning, the camaraderie, and the playing.

Many people don’t understand the drive that some amateur musicians have simply to improve. It’s an internal, personal drive that is unrelated to striving for external success. Amateurs may also strive for eventual external success, but it’s completely separate from the drive to improve.

If you’re interested in studying music as an adult, you are likely doing it for an internal need to express yourself and to improve musically. If you’re looking to transition to performance, acceptance by an audience will only come when you feel you have something “to say” musically, whether or not it’s as ”good” as you’d like it to be.

So, if you’re not ready to get out there and say something until you’ve reached a certain level, then your goal is to study and improve musically. If you want to say something,  but you’re not at a particularly high level musically, it may not matter. What you want to say may be so compelling to an audience, that being “good” on some objective level may be meaningless.

The first blog post I wrote for this site dealt with the issue of questioning your artistic contribution while at an amateur level. Regardless of where you are on your musical journey, keep the following Martha Graham quote in mind:

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.”

Cellist Biana Kovic taught 89-year-old Matty Kahn how to play the cello in 5 weeks. Kovic documented the process in the film "Virtuoso."

When cellist Biana Kovic taught at a summer music workshop in northern Maine in her 20s, she encountered a man in his 80s who had traveled from Boston to study the cello with her. He had made the drive alone. She asked him what motivated him to get in a car by himself and drive more than 300 miles for cello lessons. “He told me that his love for music and cello kept him going; at that point, I realized that for some people, playing the cello was more than just having music in their lives – it was the very ‘oxygen’ that kept them alive.”

Kovic, now 35, teaches cello to adults through her New York studio It’s Never 2 Late Inc. – Cello Studio for Adults and produced and directed the short film Virtuoso, an award-winning documentary about a five-week period during which Kovic teaches an 89-year-old woman to play the cello.

Virtuoso was inspired by a  conversation: “My friend had read in the newspaper that most people ‘die with music in their hearts.’ I was so moved by the statement, that I began to wonder what it would take to give an opportunity to a person, who always had a dream of learning to play the cello, to actually do it.”

Music After 50 talked to Kovic about the capacity for adults to learn music later in life, and about the making of Virtuoso.

LRG: What is the biggest misconception about adult learners?

BK: There are two misconceptions about adult learners: One is that adult students cannot learn to play an instrument well, especially if they start later in life. The second is that adult students learn to play an instrument at a slower pace than children.

I think that both misconceptions are partially due to the fact that adult students give up playing an instrument faster than children. Children have parents that support them to learn and get them to regularly attend lessons. Adults, on the other hand, depend solely on their own enthusiasm, curiosity and love for music. So, if life gets busy, and going to lessons becomes challenging, there is a good chance that adult students may stop their studies, and tell you they’ll come back later when everything gets back to ‘normal.’ But very often, that doesn’t happen. Adult students do not often have the support they need in order to continue.

Encouragement and understanding by adults are the strongest advantages that children have over adults. While adults are working toward making their lives ‘normal’ and waiting for that perfect opportunity, children are continuously learning and growing as players.

LRG: When did you start playing the cello, and where did you study? 

BK: I started playing the cello when I was six years old and I progressed very quickly. I had seen the cello in an orchestra, and asked my parents if I could learn to play it. I liked it because it was the biggest instrument; I couldn’t see the bass from where I was sitting. At the age of 16, I enrolled at the University of Musical Arts [in Serbia] and graduated in four years.  I have performed at Carnegie Hall, Weill Recital Hall, Steinway Hall, Cami Hall, Zankel Hall, The Open Center, The Tibetan House and Avery Fisher Hall. I also continued my musical and teacher training at Suzuki Institutes in Chicago and Connecticut; and at the NLP Center of New York. Currently I am working on my MS degree in Educational Psychology and Methodology at SUNY.

LRG: You told me that adults learn more quickly than children; why is that?

BK: Adults have the ability to assess incoming information quickly and, if it’s not clear, they will ask questions that yield solutions. Also, adults can focus for long periods of time, especially if they are interested in and enjoy the activity they are doing.

LRG: What percentage of your students never played as children?

BK: About 80% of my students never played the cello or any other instrument as children. Such was the case of a former student of mine who saw a guy playing the cello in the subway and had an instant connection with the sound and the shape of the cello. The next day he showed up at the school in which I was teaching and asked me to teach him to play the cello. Now, five years later, he plays in his church and community orchestra.

His example, along with stories of many other adult students whom I have taught, have showed me that there is no disadvantage in beginning to learn an instrument without previous experience. It would be wonderful if we could all have done it while we were young, but some people get a chance and some people don’t.  The key to our progress now is to give ourselves a fair chance to experience the positive influence that active music participation can create in our lives.

LRG: How long did it take you to get Virtuoso off the ground?

BK: I spent one year raising funds for the project, called “Never2Late,” and looking for a volunteer who would be interested in learning to play the cello and allow me to document the learning process.

LRG: Was it easy to find someone to “star” in the film?

BK: Looking for a volunteer was very difficult. I went to many senior centers and spoke about the Never2Late Project and its purpose. I expressed my thoughts on the benefits of music and musical training. Many people felt that they were either too old or too ill to devote themselves to learning a new skill. The people who showed an interest in participating in the project were discouraged by their families and eventually dropped out. 

In late February of 2006, at my sister’s suggestion, I went to the 92nd Street Y to promote the Never2Late Project. I spoke about it, and Matty Kahn, 89-year-old artist from New York, was one of the people who showed an interest. She was very excited, enthusiastic, and ready to begin learning immediately.

Within a week, I prepared a shooting schedule and lesson plan. We started the lessons and filming in March 2006.  I arranged the shooting schedule so that the crew came to Matty’s home on every Thursday of that March to document how Matty learned and adapted to the cello. In addition to filming, Matty practiced every day for 10 to 15 minutes. On Mondays, Wednesday, and sometimes Saturdays, I went to Matty’s apartment to teach her in 25- to 30-minute-long lessons. The last week of March, we asked Matty what she would like to do on the last day of filming. Her suggestion was to talk to us about her experience and then play a few lines of a French folk song.

LRG: How did your volunteer, Matty Kahn, feel about the experience?

BK: Matty’s feedback was that her focus, dexterity, and agility had tremendously improved within only a month of cello lessons. She also felt happier, because one of her dreams came true.

My goal with Virtuoso was to show that age does not have to define how we see ourselves and what we can or cannot do. I wanted people to recognize, by witnessing Matty’s learning curve, that it is never too late to learn and that there are benefits to harvest from any learning experience, no matter the length of it.  

Ever since Virtuoso was made, I have had the honor of showing it to numerous senior centers and film festivals. The film was awarded with two first-prizes, one at the South Africa International Film Festival and the other at the British Film Festival of Los Angeles. 

LRG: What does the future hold for you, as far as the film, teaching, or other projects?

BK: My biggest dream is for people to be inspired by Virtuoso. As a teacher, I recognize that learning does not stop with aging and that there are many benefits that come with musical training. I hope to travel nationally to present Virtuoso to a wider audience and discuss the importance of music, musical training, and learning.

LRG: Watch a 2-minute clip of Virtuoso on YouTube.

Music books are great to use as supplements, but they can't replace the student-teacher relationship.

Music instruction books are most effective as supplements. Private music study is more effective in helping to organize and develop your talent.

The most obvious problem with a book is that it cannot be adapted to the individual. There is no way to get answers to questions that come up as you go through a book. That being said, however, if a book is targeted at a specific topic of interest, it can be a very effective tool.

An example from my own collection is Mastering the Modes - a very specific study of the musical system called the modes. For those interested in contemporary improvisation, it is extremely useful for its information, organization, reference material, and explanation of the modes.

Still, if you’re at a beginning or advanced-beginning level, it is very important for you to have a teacher. No book, no matter how good, can replace a student-teacher relationship.

Because talent can only be identified in retrospect, moving forward is the only logical direction in which to go.

Since musical talent is so difficult to define or even recognize – talent - or the lack of it, has created more than its share of anxiety in adult learners. Perhaps the greatest problem centers around the fact that talent is a fact in retrospect. Only after it has been developed does it become obvious that it exists.

Your only option when you study music is to move forward! Many people feel that if they were talented they would not feel frustration. Nothing could be further from the truth. To be discouraged is human and being talented or not being talented does not excuse anyone from being human.

The Greek golden mean of moderation, harmony, and balance is helpful to think about while developing musical skills. Since excessive reactions are so common in those who are pursuing music, the concepts of avoiding extremes – developing patience, control, and perspective are helpful in the search for musical progress.

One fact emerges clearly – that which exists within you is uniquely yours. Thus, you continue forward to develop your potential. As it develops, call it talent, if you’d like, but there really is no need to identify or categorize it. No one is responsible for the potential within him or her. You’re responsible only for the development of your own potential.

For many people, it is hard to believe that a successful musician ever struggled with the feeling that he or she was not “talented.” The reality is: most of them did.

More on talent:

• Waiting Til You Have Something to Say
• Do I Need Talent to Sing or Play Music?